Everything Hurts My Feelings

Tonight I took the girls to his place and hugged and kissed them goodbye after we had brought in all of their stuff. I wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible. Pretty Baby Girl had to go to the bathroom so I shooed her along to go before she went in her diaper (she's potty training). She walked in his room and exclaimed, "Mommy, come see...come see!" I went into his room and saw a big fat brand new comforter on the bed with about a kazillion matching pillows. I immediatly knew this was something that he didn't pick out...there were too many pillows. I wanted out of there immediately. Pretty Big Girl wanted to show off the new bedspread in her room (I had already seen it on a pic on his phone). I looked at it and saw it was pretty and basically ran out. He said, "You don't have to run out, you can hang out." I said, "My car is running and shut the door." Thank goodness I had already hugged the girls bye or I would not have been able to do it again. Seeing that bedspread was just another nail in the coffin. Another way of him saying "I'm not coming back." I ran home and got some diapers because I had forgot to pack some for Pretty Baby Girl and packed a bag to go stay at a friends house. I just couldn't be home alone on a Friday night. I ran the diapers back over there and texted him and said I was leaving them on the doorstep. He texted back and told me to "come on in. I'll unlock the door. We're at the bath." I didn't...I just left them. I couldn't deal with being in that place again and having to kiss my girls goodbye again. As I left them on the doorstep I noticed he had also bought a welcome mat. Another nail. I cried all the way to my friends house.