The Tree

I texted him this morning and asked "how are the girls?" He responded and said, "They are good. They slept late and I made them french toast. We are headed to the woods to cut down and christmas tree and then are going to make decorations for it."

Really? Wow, wish you would have been this creative when we were married. What a shame.

Everything Hurts My Feelings

Tonight I took the girls to his place and hugged and kissed them goodbye after we had brought in all of their stuff. I wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible. Pretty Baby Girl had to go to the bathroom so I shooed her along to go before she went in her diaper (she's potty training). She walked in his room and exclaimed, "Mommy, come see...come see!" I went into his room and saw a big fat brand new comforter on the bed with about a kazillion matching pillows. I immediatly knew this was something that he didn't pick out...there were too many pillows. I wanted out of there immediately. Pretty Big Girl wanted to show off the new bedspread in her room (I had already seen it on a pic on his phone). I looked at it and saw it was pretty and basically ran out. He said, "You don't have to run out, you can hang out." I said, "My car is running and shut the door." Thank goodness I had already hugged the girls bye or I would not have been able to do it again. Seeing that bedspread was just another nail in the coffin. Another way of him saying "I'm not coming back." I ran home and got some diapers because I had forgot to pack some for Pretty Baby Girl and packed a bag to go stay at a friends house. I just couldn't be home alone on a Friday night. I ran the diapers back over there and texted him and said I was leaving them on the doorstep. He texted back and told me to "come on in. I'll unlock the door. We're at the bath." I didn't...I just left them. I couldn't deal with being in that place again and having to kiss my girls goodbye again. As I left them on the doorstep I noticed he had also bought a welcome mat. Another nail. I cried all the way to my friends house.

Bye

That's the only word I said to him today. He called from Chicago at 9:15 to talk to the girls and when they handed me the phone after they were finished I said "bye" and he said "bye". That was all for today.